Mental illness is mental giftedness. It is actually a mental gift in a terrible state of development. The process of transforming the illness into a useful gift can be a long one. It may even take years.
One must pass through life's hell to come to this heavenly new mind, and the wondrous life possible with it. It is worth the pain, and fear, and years of paranoia that you must endure to come to it.
God is with you even if you have no sense of His presence. He is with you through your illness, He is with you, and will bring you to the places you need to be to receive this new mind. It is a mind like Christ's, creative, and capable of sound thought. It can create any good, or great life you desire.
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Transforming the ill mind to a new one is difficult. It requires mental effort, and you may need many years of preparation in the areas of thinking and belief where your mind is concerned. It can be done, and its worth any distance you must travel for the prize of mental soundness, and health.